Its 3:51 am as I write this post out. I just need to clear my head. Something just isnt right, I cant seem to get enough sleep anymore. My mind just wanders off into weird places.
I miss shako, I never thought I would say this but I actually miss the people from home. I miss my group of friends that I got to be with. I miss the people that made my life just so enjoyable. Here I havent really found anyone like that. But this is a bigger issue for me. There is this girl that for some reason cannot leave my head. Can someone help me figure out why? We were the best of friends and now, well now we just arent anything anymore but she is the person that I miss the most. I dont understand my mind. She is like the perfect girl. Whoever you are that gets her, well you sir are one extremely lucky guy. I know I have no chance with her anymore. She probably has moved on from me but sadly I wish I could fix my wrongs wkth her and try this all over again. I was stupid.
That alone is a huge issue. Maybe thats why I want a girlfriend so bad. Maybe its my mind trying to tell me that thats how I leave her. But until I am able to find a girl that actually likes me, forever alone, if that could ever happen than ill be glad.
Pretty sure I still love you
Steven
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